And it is usually women who are expected to do the extra work and take the hit in their careers. That is also why jokes about "suegras" (MIL) are so common and people complain a lot about mean MIL.

In my family, my mother has three brothers, well, she is the one that spends more time and money on taking care of my grandma. And her SILs are the ones that help her when she can't do something, not my uncles.

It is great that you want elders to live with their families (although small houses are another problem with this option), but maybe men could share the work in order to make it more viable. That includes not claiming that they deserve a promotion for working longer hours. Do you feel that you are more deserving of promotion than the coworker who has to take care of elders and children? OK, but then don't complain if women choose to send the elders to nursing homes. You are forcing the choice on them.