Depend on how you look at it. Being the default for many things has its advantages. To put a not gendered example. I had a very tall friend. He has problems with doors in modern houses (he needed to lower his head to not bump with them), he needed custom beds (because his feet would fall out of bed), and couldn’t buy clothes at regular shops because they were too small. Being average height is easier because things are built for you.
Well, men have been the default for everything, medication doses are measured considering men’s hormones and average weight. Tools and phones are designed for their average hand-size, society is designed to suit their needs (not so much women’s or children’s needs). I could go on.
We would never know what could have happened if things would have been designed with women in charge or in a more equal society. But what we do know is that men are the ones who have decided how things work. You keep talking about men’s contributions and achievements. But as I told you, I think that the problem is not that feminists don’t value that, but that they also value women’s achievements and contributions while men take that for granted. And that feminists also take into account the bad things. Put all that in a balanced and decide that for them it is not worth it.
And I’ll add something about IMD, I think it is needed, but the way I see it, some of the men’s problems that need to be addressed, might be the result of patriarchy. For example loneliness. Or not being able to ask for help. The idea is that your value depends on how much money you make. All those things would only get worse if the “default solution” is to expect a wife to solve those problems for you while pretending she is not doing that in order to not hurt the husband's pride.
When men do something, it is expected out of them or they don’t hold any value otherwise.
Do you actually think that anyone value what women do? It is quite clear that they don’t value pregnancy or birth by the way that is reduced to “just 9 months!” or “You can just give it for adoption” as if there weren’t women literally dying because of pregnancy or birth. Or domestic chores, that are considered “our work” but valued a no money at all. All those things are taken for granted and only noticed when we don’t do them. To complain about how bad and selfish we are. And if we work outside the home full time? Well, that won’t count either because “it’s our choice”. Which I guess is valid for both men and women, we work for the money or because we like our jobs. The “payment” is your wage, learning, and personal growth. Expecting to be celebrated for that, well, that is an extra that you seem to expect from women. And the fact that expecting that extra from women feels natural or fair to you is precisely that “default”. Women rarely get recognized and most of the time won’t expect it.
Let’s just say that “the impact positive masculine qualities leading to those accomplishments.” is subjective. What for you and many men are positive, might not be positive from women’s perspective or have “side effects” that made other people consider that is not worth it.
I’m all for addressing men’s problems. But the conclusions I reach might not be ones that make you comfortable. After all, what I think might reduce men’s loneliness is for them to learn to be more in touch with their emotions and more empathetic, not having a wife that does social connections for the two of them.
By the way, feminists do celebrate some men’s achievements. For example, men getting more involved in child-raising. That is an achievement. Not one sanctioned by patriarchy, but a great achievement.
