Have you considered that the problem is that many women are tired of empathising with men who claim to listen but really don't?
An example, when I was a teenager I used to complain about not having women as heros in the comics and was told to "write my own stories if I didn't like it". When I was treated badly by a man, I was told to "grow a thick skin". When what I said was ignored that "I needed to be more assertive". The list goes on. The funny thing is that the same people who told me those things (many male friends) latter come to me to complain about very similar things and expected me to simpathise. And for a while I did. But at some point I told them that it was the same situation. Some understand and I still simpathize with them. other started really convoluted explanations about how when it happens to them "is different". I've distanced myself from those. No big arguments, no "fuck all men" but an action. They resent that I no longer are available for emotional confort. Apparently I am being unfair.
And this is the "essence" of the "fuck all men" or "fuck the patriarchy". Yes, it is catharsis for some. But is also a message that it is ok to stop being nice to people who is not nice back and would never, ever listen or understand where you are comming from. They simply won't, because for them there is no reason. You are doing what they want already and at no point do they fear that you stop.
Except that now some women have stoped listening to them, doing things for them in enough numbers for them to notice. Would they change now? It is unlikely, but they wouldn't have chaged if they were given what they wanted anyway. So they aren't really a loss. And the energy that before was wasted in them is now used in other things. So for those women is still a win. The win is not on men changing, that was never happening. The win is for women having the option to walk away from a rigged game. And is not man bashing is simply saying no to something that is bad for women. Not loving someone doesn't mean hating. It may very well mean indiference or neutrality.
