I get that people usually only care about things that affect them (although we could question what affects us). What gets me/anoy me is that at the same time they claim to protect us (and consider that "we owe them" for that "protection").

As for things to do, some times is not about being "heroic" or anything dramatic. It is more about a shift of perspective and discourse. To put an example: if men wrote about how terrible this is for men what Dominic Pelicot and his fellow rapist have done and how those men destroy families, that helps. For starters because that men is destroying families right now by making women doubt the men they have been married for years. After all, on paper many of those men were fathers and husbands. So yes, what those men have done affects men.

Or when there is "locker room talk" and men joke or take lightly about this things, maybe be the mood killer and tell them they are wrong. Because as you said, many men won't admit to be rapist. Not with those words. But many men would say things like "When they are drunk they are easier". Or "look as those sluts". Or many, many other things that basically mean that if something were to happen to that woman, it would "her fault" or partially her fault. It is like walking a path, the more you walk along, the closer you are to the destination. Once you start saying that if "she doesn't say no, she consented" you introduce the option to drug her (so she can't say no) and then, it "doesn't count as rape". Or if you introduce the concept of "wives owing sex to husbands" then you say "rape in marriage doesn't count". All those things add up. And create more opportunities for "opportunist rapists" and make socially acceptable certain forms of rape (which would increase the percentage of rapists). Pointed questions and comments at the right time by someone they see as people (since they don't see women as people), might make them think and third parties reconsider who is in the wrong.

And well, maybe all the people you know are ok (people tend to surround themselves with people with similar ideas), but it is also possible that you have a rapist among your friends and are not aware. And if you made him feel bad by talking about how wrong is rape and how that destroys families, you would be helping. Because rapists deserve to feel bad.

Men always talk about "fake denounces" (which many times aren't fake) and about male suicide. Maybe it is time they talk about rape. And think about how rape is ruining their chances at dating, forming families or mantaining the trust of the women in their lives. Again, think about what the french women might be thinking now. And how the other neigbours of Pelicot might be looking at their fathers and husbands while wondering, would he be one of them? would there be pictures of me being abused on the rapist forums? And most likely the man is completely innocent, but since Pelicot seemed normal too, there would be that shadow of doubt. Indirectly, Pelicot has affected many, many men. He is in fact an example of the "men vs bear" problem because he make women think "Pelicot vs bear" and suddently chosing the bear doesn't seem so irrational.