I guess it is a matter of perspective. From their point of view, they are the wronged ones. I mean, they were brought up by loving mothers and grandmothers who put up with everything their fathers and grandfathers decided and still keep a good face in front of them. Their mother would keep their frustration, anger, and sadness out of their sights. So they grow up believing that their mothers were genuinely happy like this. And they expected the same just to found out that no, we don’t want that and that many times if you dig in the past, you find dirty secrets like rapes, abuses and not so perfect past. We are popping their bubbles, their fantasy.

I agree that they didn’t realize how good they still had it, but they used to have a perfect fantasy and by comparison, reality is hard. Also, they haven’t taught how to deal with that, they were shielded by their mothers. To sum up, they are thin skinned but were made to believe they were “strong” and “hardened”, so they lash out, which is what it worked for their fathers…