I'm confused. You start by saying that feminist hurts men and then make a case about how men do need femenist to free themselves from unfair expectations...

As for chivalry, I think it needs to evolve into kindness and politeness. I mean, if I reach a door before a man, should I wait until he reach th door so he opens and holds it for me or should I just open it and hold it for him so the door doesn't close in his face? I would say that the second makes more sense.

Most chivalrous gestures, can be done to anyone as it would be the kind/polite thing to do. And nothing prevent us from doing them too. You can treat a man to a fancy dinner or many of the other "chivalrous" gestures. Granted, some of them doesn't make sense, like helping someone to take a seat now that we won't use complicate cloting. But many of them would be nice for men too. And that is feminism.

So if you want a man who has kindness, why not show him kindness? Just saying.