So you were speaking of only one woman.

Ok, so there are "strong" (this is subjetive) women who aren't feminist. In a world were there is a lot of inequality and fighting for equality has a cost. Sure, your wife might be anti-feminist and even benefit from being antifeminist since that way she get approval from non feminist men who might be in power positions. Did your wife has a male bosses?

You say she is in a male dominated profession. That means that if she adopts a feminist position, she might make the men arounf her (being her bosses or underlings) uncomfortable. And if she makes them uncomfortable, that would mean that her position might be more unstable or she can even lose it. After fighting really hard to get there.

I've been in a similar position, where speaking honestly about my values would have geopardized my job. And I can see how someone in a similar position might choose the "easy" path or the path of least resistance (going along with sexism). But at the end of the day, while I respect her choice, I don't share it.

So when you say that there is a lot strong women that are antifeminist, that is not news to me. It could even happen that some women who are in positions to exploit sexism might lose with feminism. And women who get approval of men in power by being antifeminist. But that doesn't mean that their point of view means that there is no sexism or that sexism is OK. Or that there are not strong women among feminist. And in the same way that feminist doesn't speak on your wifes name, she doesn't speak in our name. Not her opinion invalidates ours. At the end of the day, she is benefiting and would continue benefiting from the advances that we have fight for.

She is in a male dominated profession? That is thanks the feminist that fought for women being allowed to go to university and to work without a husbands permision. She is in a management position? Well faminist fighted to normalize that. And if feminist get their way, one day she might even enjoy a better situation or stop being in a male dominated profession in favor of a non dominated profession.

But if she really thinks that feminist is not positive, she has the right and the hability to live under the traditional values, since feminist also allow her to stay at home if you agree with that. It is a combined choice for the couple. Feminist haven't take away her choice. Or she can ask for lower wage. It makes no sense to me, but she have the choice to live under non feminist values. Did she decided to marry you or it was her father who choose for her? Whatever the answer, it was her choice thanks to feminists who make it a choice.

Now feminist are still fighting for other rights that she might think are not needed. But then again, if she doesn't want them, she can choose to not use them. And I can see her point of view, she probably doesn't consider that those rights are worth the cost we would need to pay. But chances are that she won't be the one paying, but us. And we disagree that the cost of status quo is worth what we get in traditional society. So we are not paying the price for things to go back to what they were. So if her antifeminism relies on other women steping back in line while she keeps enjoying herself in a male dominated profession, she might find out that her "being emphatically non feminist" is somehow innefective.

I mean, sure one of my grandmas would like me to become a SAHM, but thankfully she doesn't get to decide for me. Sure some strong non feminist might want that their daughters in law stay home, but it is not their choice. And I think this is what this articles are really about. People like you trying to persuade or even presure young women to prioritize what you want over what they themselves want. taking away their choice from them. While the feminist are here, showing that there are different choices. The fact that even non feminist have embraced things achieved by feminist (like having your own bank account) tells me that in the long term, no matter how many "anti-feminist" women are there, whenever a right is gained, they would end using it whenever it suits them. And that means that in the long term, they'll end supporting feminism too. Even my grandma has a clear understanding that her bank account is hers, not my grampa's or uncles'. And your non feminist wife knows she is the one in charge at her work, she doesn't submit to the men. Some changes are here to stay.