Sure, I agree that boys are discouraged. That is why I said that part of teaching them is how you react when they show emotion.
And while I'm white, reading about misogynoir, I think that black people also learn more emotional maturity because they have no choice. They are forced to do it by need much in the same way girls are forced by need and expectation that we manage our emotions (in order to not inconvenience men) and other people's emotions, specially men.
What I'm trying to say is that many men do have more emotional intelligence than they think. They use it to get ahead in the corportate ladder or to fit in social groups or other situations where it is acceptable for them. They could use it in more areas if they just swiched perspective. I mean, how many times you see men expresing emotions at the superbowl or other sports event? They can do it, they just think that doing it outside approved places is "unmanly". But then the problem is that they think that "unmanly" = "womanly" = "bad". The second a man stops seeing women as less, they'll start valuing skills that are usually seen as "femenine" like emotional maturity. The second they start valuing something, they would do it. Example: Cooking. Now with master chef and other TV shows it starts to be cool and some men have started cooking.
Math is different. Most people don't like math and are bad at it. Yes, many boys are terrible at math too XD. But since it is valued, many girls do in fact learn math. And sure, someone telling you that you should be bad is an obstacle, but I was good in math. And since it is something "objetive", it was easier to prove it. You solve the problem and they can't say that you didn't. It is more that when a girl is good at math, teachers don't encourage her to pursue her interest further. They tell you to study economics or even something "softer", not engineering. So the ability in math ends being not developed fully.
Emotions are "natural" in the same way that running is "natural". Sure someone can teach you things to do it better, but running is something that comes to you by instinct. Emotions are the same. You feel regardless you want to or not. You have emotions since you are a child. What you learn to do with them is also "day to day" and how people react to your displays of emotion.
For example, some men have learned that by trying a woman to feel sorrow for them they can get sex. So they use emotions there for their advantage. Why they do it? because it works for them.
