The woman who study and work are also femenine. Creating your own business is also femininity. Being a scientist is also femininity. All women including trans women have their won version of femininity. The traditional version is just one way more. And like a dress, you can change it if it doesn't suit you. And wear one for a dinner, and another for work. And a completelly different version for family and friends.

Perform compliance to some men's dream of a woman might work for a while, but it can also fail. It has a cost and some women don't want to pay it. Ot worked for you, it wouldn't have worked for me, I would have been miserable. Each person needs to find their own way and what works for them.