There is a high chance that you surround yourself with people with similar views than you.

And then, there is usually different expectations and preferences. I mean, I meet once a man who claimed that he wanted to be a househusband. The problem is that he didn't wanted to clean (he claimed that since his cleaning standards were lower, that it was "already clean"), he rarely cook, not cleaned the kitchen after, didn't run errands, and basically didn't do the task that traditional housewives did because he didn't consider those things "his job". So in practice, while he said that women didn't want him as a househusband, he was just bad at the job.

When women say that they want a househusband, they say it in a context where they end doing most domestic chores on top of working outside the home and paying all the bills. When you read stories, you find this a lot of times.

Now, as you very well say, being a househusband is a finantial risk. And the way you can ensure some safety net is the same that housewives have:

1. Marriage without prenup.

2. Marriage with a prenup that specifically cover compensation.

3. A money assignment that it is exclusive for you.

I assume you'll find the same difficulties that housewives have to secure something like that. And the most common today is that one wage is usually not enough to cover bills. I guess that you can look for an older woman with more stable career and a good economic position like traditional women do. And look for dates where the women offers to pay. That would signal that she is at least open to the idea.

What is clear is that the kind of women who might like a househusband, would look for different things and act differently than the traditional women. And probably would take charge.