This is the same as the idea of "Larry", your "nice guy". Some people would play the role that they think would get them the kind of dates they want. Sara and Larry are two sided of the same coin and many times they would end together.

But there are many types of women. Some wait for marriage, others for a relationships where they have had several succesful dates and they feel comfortable with the men. Others like one night hookups. There is nothing wrong with all that.

But if Larry wants something from Sara and she doesn't want to give it to him, then he should just accept that. It is on him to move on in the same way that the women who want marriage should break up with men who won't marry them.

Honestly, by your own description Larry doesn't want a meaningful connection. Otherwise he would understand that when Sara says that "she is waiting for the right man" to him while not dating him, that means "not you". He has already been told. And if he really looked for connection, which is not the same as dating, marrying or having sex, then he would listen and understand the part about going out, dancing or flirting. Many people would flirt for fun without expecting to hook up. And many people would just be friendly and that mistook for "flirting". If Larry really connected with Sara, he would understand where she is comming from. and maybe he would even understand why she is not over her ex. Maybe Sara is loyal to the ex even if he doesn't deserve it? We would never know, because Larry never care and neither do you. You prefer to vilify the women who won't date Larry.

Maybe the reason Sara don't think Larry is the right one is not because she is supperficial, but because she has noticed that Larry, like you, doesn't offer her real emphaty. Instead, he fake caring in the hopes that when she is at her lowest, he falls for him. That is not exactly nice. And if she knows this, no wonder why she is not giving Larry a chance, she knows he is fake.